Today was not good. A scrapping my original, healthy dinner plan of grilled marlin and going with my ultimate comfort food of homemade mac and cheese sort of day. A turning on the tv as soon as the kids were done with their homework and vegging for an hour sort of day. And no, I don't think those two decisions make me a crappy mom; that's fine once in a while.
But this next bit does.
Weeks ago, Alex came home with a slip of paper about a bike safety day that his second grade class would be attending. There was a $20 fee, which is negligible but at that time I was being inundated by slips of paper each day for one thing or another. That day, I told him to forget the bike safety class since he was already comfortable on a bike; instead, I'd keep him home with me and we'd do something fun together.
Fast forward to today, when I dutifully arrived to pick up my boys from school, and imagine my horror when I saw Alex's class returning to school.
Carrying bike helmets.
Alex wasn't with them; how could he have been, when I hadn't returned the permission slip and the fee? Because remember, we were going to have a memorable day together, you know, like a good mom would.
But I don't get the Good Mom Award, because not only did he not participate in a bike safety course with his class, he also didn't have a fun day doing something special with his mom. Nope--he spent the day sitting in some random classroom because his mom dropped the ball, bigtime. And he was the one who was punished for it.
As soon as I saw his freckled face approach me, I apologized profusely but his eyes were teary as he told me about his day, and rightfully so.
Between winning this award that no mom wants to win and other stuff that is piling up, like Jackson's dissatisfaction at school (and my complete agreement with his feelings), it has now turned into an artisan-batch dark chocolate and orange ice cream at 9pm kind of night.
Here's hoping tomorrow is a day I can begin to redeem myself in this role that I am lucky enough to hold in these boys' lives.